Why Zwambila again?

their teeming wildlife, chattering streams, crocodile-infested rivers and wild fruits (masawu, tsambatsi, hacha, nhunguru, nhengeni), among others.
The wafting air from the nearby forests atones for nothing other than the hair-raising timid smell of the wilderness, sending a flashing chill down the spine, and so has the story of one Felix Machiridza, hit the villages.
The land of milk, honey and dust or Guruve, if you like, is awash with the story of Machiridza, having allegedly spurned, predatory sexual demands by Zimbabwe’s Ambassador to Australia, Jacqueline Zwambila.
Very few men would have said no to the full figure of Zwambila, worse still when she is your boss on foreign land, on whose benevolence you survive.
Being an African woman she is certainly shapular and onion-shaped but to a fully groomed Korekore man, there is more to a woman than a mere curvular body.
Zwambila . . . Zwambila . . . Zwambila, again! I mean Zwambila the nudist, Zwambila, Zimbabwe’s face in Australia and Zwambila, the face of MDC-T diplomacy in the inclusive Government. But why Zwambila? Hezvoko MDC-T!

RELATED

Yes, Zwambila’s butler, Machiridza comes from this Korekore land and the man has Korekore blood, morals, ethos and manhood on him. He is a humble traditional man and as humble as this villager, who comes from the same background, being born and bred by parents who taught at the same schools, at the same times, with Felix’s parents.
“Kuipa, kuipa zvaro gudo, asi haridyi chakafa choga. Mukadzi wemumwe inyama yembwa, haidyiwi,” is all how the village soothsayer, this ageless fountain of wisdom, concluded the mishap in the land of the kangaroos.

Without going into the details, merits or demerits of what happened yonder, the story has become village talk. Women sit on their buckets at the watering holes, others have found a story to pick firewood with, while men are drinking with the story.

Bonfire gatherings are awash with the story of Machiridza. Machiridza . . . Zwambila . . . Machiridza . . . Zwambila. Zwambila . . . Machiridza . . . Zwambila, Zwambila, Zwambila!
Traditional drinking binges and nightlong vigils, punctuated by dancing, drinking and communal teaching are the order of the day. Here boys and girls are taught ubuntu, hunhu and morality and the story of Machiridza has become a handy example.

“Varume itai chiMachiridza! Musadye chakafa choga.” (Do like Machiridza, don’t sleep around).
The surname Machiridza is common in the land of milk honey and dust, after being popularised by Felix’s late father Enos Machiridza, a teacher, who reached fame as an educationist during the Federation of

Rhodesia and Nyasaland, and Rhodesia, where very few black people would have been educated enough to be able to read and write, let alone teach others.
Enos Machiridza was married to Majorie Samboko in a holy matrimony solemnised by Roman Catholic Church Priest, father Eric Kotzik, a German national, who made Machiridza teach at Muzika, Chapoto and

Chitsungo primary schools. It was while teaching at Chitsungo between 1963 and 1967, that the couple gave birth to Felix.
Felix was later to become a teacher in Guruve and Harare, specialising in gender studies, journalism and African traditional music.

Like any boy bred in the land of milk and honey, Felix is a good mbira player and traditional music dancer.
In recent years, Machiridza taught gender studies to trainee journalists at CCOSA, in Harare and this villager is sure Felix’s students will tell you that the man looks simple but is strict and highly principled. He is firm.

He believes in spirit mediums and also manufactures traditional instruments, like mbira and drums, personally. Besides playing these instruments, he is also a good singer of the oral tradition songs and a dancer par excellence.

This might have attracted Zwambila and misled her too. Villagers believe that Felix will soon be possessed and that the spirits might have given him an insight into his tormentor.

Bespectacled, ever-smiling and handsome by all definitions, Machiridza could easily be mistaken for someone easy going but his heart is always with his family in Harare, for whom he thought he was going to work in Australia.

But the woman who invited him had other ideas.
The first story of Zwambila was that she stripped naked in front of embassy staff in protest against their sending information home, without her consent.

This villager is sure that Zwambila was given the benefit of doubt by a fatherly President Mugabe but this time a round what is the story?
MDC-T who stood by Zwambila that time, argued that the embassy staff was pro Zanu-PF since it had been sent there, before the inclusive Government but now here is Machiridza, invited to Australia by Zwambila herself, not by Zanu-PF.

The village soothsayer says MDC-T will only protect Zwambila this time around at its own peril.
“The ancestors tell me that she fits in well into this political party of sexcellence, violence and opulence. But they also tell me that a lizard that jumps from the tallest tree in public and claims not to be injured will certainly feel the pain at night, when alone.”

MDC-T is reflecting and Zimbabweans are awaiting the reflections. Why Zwambila again?
Feedback:[email protected]

You Might Also Like

Comments