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Cuthbert Mavheko, [email protected]
ON March 8, Zimbabwe joins the rest of the world in celebrating International Women’s Day. The day, which is celebrated annually, focuses mainly on issues such as violence and abuse against women, reproductive rights and gender equality.

As a signatory to the United Nations Convention on the Elimination of Discrimination Against Women, Zimbabwe has, over the years, crafted several policies that redress past imbalances and ensure that women are not abused and enjoy equality before the law. The Government’s efforts to end the abuse and discrimination of women are quite commendable because women have not only been abused, but have also been subdued and relegated to the margins of society since time immemorial. Hindsight shows that in times past, women’s rights were often overlooked in a degenerate and disunited, male-dominated society. If indeed the truth be told without fear of criticism or contradiction whatsoever, women were treated as second-class citizens, not only in Zimbabwe, but all over the world.

It is indeed extremely worrisome that while the Government has done much to create equality between the sexes, radical feminists seem to have completely misunderstood and misconstrued the concept of gender equality. As a long-standing journalist, I have listened to many debates and seminars on gender issues. I have also perused through feminist literature on the same issue of gender equality. Reading feminist literature, one gets the impression that feminists are actually waging an undeclared war against men.

What feminists reveal in their literature is not only thought-provoking, but does not leave one to any imagination whatsoever as regards to their goals and objectives. Feminists have outlined clear-cut policies towards attaining their goal of equality with men at work, in the family and in society in general. They argue that marriage is, by its very nature, oppressive since women are always at the bottom, in submission to their husbands. In light of this, they view marriage as exploitative and designed in such a manner that it denies a woman the full evolution of her human potential since all her energy is directed towards serving her husband.

Feminists openly challenge the age-old maxim, which stipulates that a woman can only be accepted within the family institution as long as she remains subservient sexually, submissive and obedient to her husband.

“It is common knowledge that a woman’s role in a marital relationship is that of servitude. It can thus be seen that the marriage institution discriminates against women. We are not waging a war against men as such, but against a system which not only oppresses women, but dehumanises them. In light of this, women must not rest on their laurels until the institution of marriage is revamped because its structures promote and sustain male domination,” said a 56-year-old divorced feminist from Old Lobengula suburb, who requested anonymity.

While women’s quest for gender equality is, in my own view, a noble cause, the heart-wrenching reality is that it has not only lost direction, but has actually been hijacked by radical feminists, whose apparent goal is to stage a coup d’etat against the man and usurp his God-given role as father and head of the family. In their fervent desire to reverse roles in the family unit, some feminists are already positioning themselves as heads of their families, thereby taking over their husbands’ roles. In so doing, they are unwittingly inviting the ire of their husbands. One writer aptly observed that: “Man, like any creature, does not delight in someone crossing into his territory.

He feels threatened and will strike in defence of his territorial rights. A woman who provokes her husband by being unruly and rebellious, ignites a fire that will be too difficult to put out without her experiencing the heat.”

What adds a chilling dimension to the whole scenario is that feminists have now become so radical in their approach to gender-based issues that they have misconstrued gender equality as a licence for married women to have boyfriends and to cohabit. For the benefit of the uninformed, cohabitation is a relationship, where a man and a woman stay together as husband and wife without observing any formalities of marriage, whether customary or otherwise. Although this is not classified as a marriage, it is now a popular trend in Zimbabwe.

The truth that must be told without prejudice is that most men are not comfortable with the concept of gender equality and this is causing friction in many families, leading to divorce. It is of paramount importance to mention that in the past, people knew nothing about equal rights. Men and women knew their rightful places in the family and society in general. In fact, people believed in the sanctity of marriage – that a man’s role as a father and head of the family- was God-given and therefore immutable. Because men and women knew and respected their rightful places in marriage and society, there was stability in most marriages and divorce was a rare phenomenon.

When couples took their marriage vows, it was always “till death do us part”. But this is no longer the case nowadays. Marriage is no longer a lifetime union for many couples.

It can safely be argued that in these modern times, society still regards women as inferior human beings. This is in conflict with basic human rights. Women are not second class citizens. Feminine traits are not inferior to masculine ones, they are complementary. God created us male and female so that there’s a balance of life on earth. One pertinent observation that I have personally made is that most men, who despise and deny women their rights, perceive them in the physical sense only and totally ignore the fundamental aspects of their being, like their intellectual abilities. This is because women have always been regarded as the weaker sex and therefore inferior to men. This has not only eroded the dignity and liberty of many women, but has actually reduced them to mere objects of lust.

Sober, discerning and analytical observers are in agreement that radical feminists are using gender equality as a springboard to topple the man from his God-given right as father and head of the family. God created humans male and female for an incredible transcendent potential, which remains enigmatic to most people today. Genesis 2 verse 18 shows that God created a woman to be a helper and companion to a man. Genesis 3 verse 16 also states clearly that after Adam and Eve had partaken of “the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil,” which God had forbidden them to eat, God said to Eve: “… Your desire shall be for your husband. And he shall rule over you.”

Let us put things into perspective in clear language here. It certainly would be naivety of elephantine proportions to blind ourselves to the hard, cold facts of reality. Most people do not realise that it was the very Creator of mankind who made a man to be the head of the family and to properly lead his wife, but emphatically not as an overbearing master. Marriage is not a master – slave relationship; it is a sharing and complementing relationship, where each mate recognises and appreciates the God-ordained role of his/her partner.

One cannot be totally off the mark to surmise that the scourge of divorce, which is raging in the country like an uncontrolled veld fire, cannot be extinguished as long as society continues to trample on the structure of government that God ordained in the marriage institution. It is both ironic and tragic that in these permissive modern times, society is vying for 50-50 marriages. These are marriages where a husband and his wife are supposed to share the responsibility of running the affairs of their families on an equal basis. Society is smugly ignorant and unaware that this doesn’t solve marital problems, but only serves to compound them.

As I have already said, according to the Bible, a husband should be the leader in a marriage, but neither the husband nor his wife should act in ways that antagonise each other. Marital couples should learn to recapture the wonderful attitudes that lead mates to build each other, instead of tearing each other down. Over and above this, they should learn to communicate their feelings and needs to each other, so that they can tackle their marital problems and difficulties in a constructive way.

When all is said and done, it is essential to understand that in the past, most parents adopted a lackadaisical approach in terms of educating their daughters because of the misconception that a girl’s future was in the kitchen, as a housewife. Against this sense of things, it’s heartening to note that things have since changed and girls are now getting educated on an equal footing with boys.

This has seen scores of female students climbing to the very top of the academic ladder to become respected lawyers, medical practitioners, judges, political leaders, journalists, military officers, corporate executives etc. Over the years, a significant number of these women have been praised, even adored, for their purity, patience, loyalty, their long-suffering, gentleness and love. These are priceless values that are lacking in most people today.

My fellow Zimbabweans, as we joyfully join hands with our womenfolk in celebrating International Women’s Day, let us take time to applaud the government for its tireless efforts to end the discrimination and abuse of women in the country. As a Christian nation, may we also remind disgruntled and crestfallen feminists, who are waging an undeclared, gender – driven war, against men that they will never win. Marriage is not something that evolved through the reasoning and gradual civilisation of mankind, as proponents of the evolutionary theory would have us believe.

Rather, marriage is a sacred institution that was designed and created by a benevolent Creator and its primary purpose is to make a man and a woman complete with a man as the head. For a woman is incomplete without a man and vice- versa.

As ordained by God, the marriage union is a holy thing. It is so holy that in His Word, Almighty God likens the marriage union to the relationship between Jesus Christ and His church. The spiritual depth of marriage was amplified by the Apostle Paul when he wrote: “For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church” (Ephesians 5 verses 31-32).

These verses make it unequivocally clear that marriage goes beyond the physical and actually pictures the eternal, loving and great spiritual relationship of Jesus Christ and His church. I rest my pen.

l Cuthbert Mavheko is a freelance writer and theologian. He can be reached on 0773963448/0775522095.