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Mbuso Ndlovu, Chronicle Reporter

THERE was a dishonourable brawl in Senegal’s parliament on Friday 2 December as a female MP was beaten up by a group of opposition male MPs. It is alleged she had said something bad against religious leaders supporting the opposition.  This coming on the backdrop of 16 days of activism against gender based violence in an African parliament is really worrisome.

If a whole ruling party honourable Member of Parliament can be physically violated in the August House of Assembly then please almighty God  Allah Jah  forgive us for we have not started to protect our sisters yet. That it was up to ten opposition male “dishonourables” in a Moslem Senegalese parliament on a holy Islamic Friday, December 2, kicking and punching a fully hijab covered grandma MP was received worldwide with shock.

Senegal’s soccer team was doing very well at the Qatar 2022 Soccer World Cup where they had qualified to face England in the quarter finals. Quite a remarkable achievement indeed especially since the other three African representatives, Tunisia, Cameroon and Ghana had failed to proceed beyond the group stage leaving Senegal and Morocco to do the continent proud.

The 16 days of activism against gender based violence should never be seen as directed at the “ordinary low class less educated manual labourers” who reside in the poorest sections of the cities. No. Even in the most affluent suburbs the highly educated rich men and women are vulnerable.  Even honourable MPs, lawyers, doctors and teachers are exposed to gender based violence.        

Worldwide we have seen hugely successful sports persons, academics and entertainers committing suicide just because they could not handle personal relationships. Most have gone by the hand of their erstwhile lovers while others could not stomach rejection. Either way suicide or homicide has unnecessarily claimed lots of productive lives.
Some people have lost lives as a “result of love”. Due to the young couples fully surrendering their souls, hearts, lives and futures to people they will have just known, say for two weeks or months, the disappointment that often comes with matters of the heart usually overwhelms them. Post-coital triestesse is real.  It has not been explored fully but one feels that a lot of people really feel used after the act and some experience feelings of aggression and even disillusionment such that they may commit murder or suicide.

It has been noted in most African societies that women are at the lower rungs of influence in society yet at home they are almost 100 percent influential in child rearing. What then changes when they leave the home? Why are we even celebrating 30% to 40% female participation in politics when they could be 52% as per population censuses continent wide. If Rwanda has a majority of female MPs and Ministers  why is it so difficult elsewhere? What have the males done that the women would not have (mis)achieved just like their male counterparts?

In the home most males seem to have been afflicted by the Dunning-Krugger Effect whereby you think you are more competent than you actually are. By virtue of being male one fools themselves into believing they are better than their female counterparts to the extent that they use muscles to keep them down. It doesn’t matter what the female ideas are, what nutters “think” is that all great ideas come from males. Hence any woman whether sisters, neighbour, colleague or wife will be violently taught to succumb to male authority. Those who are adamant will be physically eliminated.

What those male narcissists forget is that they cannot exist in an all male world. They cannot reproduce and make rational decisions. It takes both male and female to prolong our existence on the planet. Essentially while females could harvest male productive essentials and inseminate selves for child production,  males can’t have similar results.

Gender based violence cannot be acceptable whether it is male or female aggression. It doesn’t have to be physical. Neither does it involve adults or parents only. Recently the African continent was shocked when we watched  black American girls whose parents are originally from Uganda, telling off their father over his girlfriend. The father and mother remained quiet while the three girls used vulgar language to verbally assault and show their displeasure that their father had cheated on their mother. It may have been the coarse language that shocked us but the disgust the girls felt was widely shared.

Closer home, Socialite Moira Knight called out her father radio personality Eric Knight for allegedly cheating on her mother in a case that many followers felt could have been handled internally. She was later to dump her musician husband for cheating and violence. That showed she walked the talk and many stood by her. Even closer home, a  Killarney, Bulawayo, woman beat up her son after he had confronted his father as to why he was cheating on his mother. The father, apparently feeling guilty did not fight back but the mother asked her son who he thought he was, beating up her husband. She made it clear he was no longer welcome and had to go to his “real” father’s house as no son of hers could engage in domestic violence by beating her sweetheart. The 20 year old left for South Africa and the parents have ignored all his phone calls. Ironically she does not view cheating as a form of gender based violence as long as the cheating is done away from home and the husband comes back to her bosom. What matters to her is that he always wakes up in the morning next to her, not what time he returned home. According to her no child can disrespect their father (or mother) unless they have another “real father” elsewhere.
 

In its statement marking the16 days of activism against gender based violence the Zimbabwe Women Lawyers Association called on members of society to “take an active role in ending violence against women and girls by reporting perpetrators, providing support to survivors of violence and openly discussing these issues to challenge stigma.” This stance must be embraced by all of us if the 16 days of activism against gender based violence are to bear lasting fruits. There is no doubt that the battle will be long given that some of the victims do not really appreciate or believe that the fight will eventually be won. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe noted that difficulties increase the nearer we get to the goal, therefore as a nation we must violently confont this gender based violence. All forms of gender based violence must be violently confronted by all means necessary.

It might be difficult for someone like me who bore one kid who happens to be a girl to visualise a situation in which she can be beaten up by her husband yet she never tasted a whip at home or at school till NUST. It is just preposterous. She should also never subject someone’s son to domestic gender based terrorism!

Gender based domestic terrorism in which our sons fear going home and would rather spend unusually long hours at work or pubs must not be ignored. Many a time have we witnessed males spending almost whole nights in town and later the last few hours parked outside their gates just because they fear spending nights in bed with a monster they are married to.
This shows that gender based violence must never be taken to mean it concerns females only because those same females have sons who need protection from “vampire” women too.