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Lenox Lizwi Mhlanga

EVIDENTLY, from what came out of my last article, I am not alone in thinking that there is something very wrong with most commuter bus drivers and their foul-mouthed touts. It was not until I read an article in the Journal of Psychiatry that I realised there are people who suffer from a disease that manifests itself when one is on the road. 

To you, that angry, swearing, horn-blasting moron has road rage. But doctors have another name for it – Intermittent Explosive Disorder or IED for short. A new study suggests it is far more common than we realised, affecting up to 47 percent of all drivers, if not more.

People think it’s just bad behaviour, one just needs an attitude adjustment. Yet, what they don’t know, writes Dr Emil Coccaro of the University of Chicago’s Medical School, is that there’s a biology and cognitive science to this. 

Road rage temper outbursts that involve throwing or breaking objects and even spousal abuse can sometimes be attributed to the disorder. And don’t get me wrong. Mampintsha doesn’t suffer from this,                                                                                                                           nor does Babes Wodumo, if you are a fan of the former.

The disorder first appears in adolescence at the average age of 14, the study says. Remember those tantrums you threw at the toy shop when your father told you he had no money to buy that bicycle?

By definition, intermittent explosive disorder involves multiple outbursts that are way out of proportion to the situation. These angry outbursts often include threats or aggressive actions and damage to property, and individuals. Sounds familiar? That places commuter drivers and touts firmly at the top of the list. In short, they are mentally ill and they are not aware of it!

For illustration, I found myself eavesdropping (if one may call it that) on a casual conversation between a driver and his trusted uwindi. They were discussing how they would be able to afford a straight of cheap brandy if they unilaterally raised the commuter fare to $1.50. 

Now, are these chaps sick or what? Which goes to show just how unilateral and unreasonable some of their fare increases are. They are motivated by greed more than anything else!

Dr Coccaroalso said the disorder involves inadequate production or functioning of serotonin, a mood-regulating and behaviour-inhibiting brain chemical. Treatment with anti-depressants, including those that target serotonin receptors in the brain, is often helpful, along with behaviour therapy similar to attending anger management classes.

Psychiatrists seem to have found that IED is more common than previously thought. We, on the other hand, have known it all along. Kombi drivers, touts, and quite a sizeable number of “ordinary” drivers desperately need help fast before they kill someone.

Which reminds me of the following incident. A father, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort to be with his family at the weekends. Every Sunday morning, he would take his daughter out for a drive in the car. 

One particular Sunday, however, he had a bad cold and he really didn’t feel like driving at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and decided that for this particular week, she would take their daughter out. They returned just before lunch and the little girl quickly ran to the main bedroom to see her father.

“Well” the father asked, “Did you enjoy your ride with mummy?” “Oh yes, Daddy” the girl replied, “And you know what . . . we didn’t see a single bastard!”

And on another pertinent issue, if complaining were a competitive sport, Zimbabweans would win the World Cup. We complain about just everything and anything. Are we just outright rabble-rousing pests? Is it because we always get the short end of the stick when it comes to service? And here I am being liberal, if you get my drift.

However, one cannot deny the fact that it is our constitutional right to complain. Even if there is nothing specifically wrong. For service providers to know who exactly is king, we have to keep them constantly on their toes.

I have to admit that at times, clarity becomes an issue when we attempt to put our case across. I should know because I was, in one of my more than nine occupational lives, the senior public relations officer of the City of Bulawayo. Entertaining complaints and trying to solve them took a significant chunk of my time. I should admit that some of the grievances were quite hilarious. 

I will attempt to share some of them. Many were anonymous, of course. But if you are one of those who make it a habit of writing letters of complaint to the City Council, then you may be embarrassed to read these:

“I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.”

“The lavatory is blocked and this is caused by the boys next door throwing their balls on the roof.”

“This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the man next door.”

“The toilet seat is cracked, where do I stand?”

“I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the wall.”

“I am still having trouble with smoke in my built in drawers.”

“I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.”

“Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.”

“Can you please tell me when repairs are going to be done as my wife is about to become an expectant mother.”

“The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.”

“Will you please send someone to mend our broken path? Yesterday my wife tripped on it and is now pregnant.”

“Our kitchen floor is very damp, we have two children and would like a third, and so will you please send someone to do something about it.”

“Would you please repair our toilet, my son pulled the chain and the box fell on his head.”

“Will you please send a man to look at my water; it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.”

“This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broken and we cannot get the ZBC.  When I applied for a rebate you said that you would have to take something off. Now that you have taken it off, I have been told that you should have put some on. So will you please take off what you took off and put on what you should have put on when you took it off?”

Have a happy Women’s Day!